


A painful message

by shadova



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-08 01:05:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17971547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadova/pseuds/shadova
Summary: When Garrus Vakarian believes that the famed Gabrielle Shepard is dead with no hope of returning, his depression sends him on a wander.





	A painful message

Silence. Eery silence, save for whatever buildings remained shrieking as they collapsed and added to the heap of collected rubble.  
What once stood as a populated empire of towering structures was reduced to a skeletal ruin. Inside the dead arm of the Citadel was clouds of dust and the constant zapping of shorting electrical wires.

Wandering through a seemingly endless carcass of an ancient collecting edifice, was a lightly-treading Garrus Vakarian who had stumbled across the crash landing site of what was left of the Citadel. It was odd. His ears were so accustomed to the humming of vehicles, the occasional criminals attempting to evade justice, chatter from merchants and businessmen and civilians. Now, his ears rung with deafening silence.

A loose chunk of debris scattered when his leg swung to take another step, causing his focus to redirect to his feet. Dipping to a knee, Garrus raked an armoured, three-fingered hand through the clumps of chunky dirt and ash to try and ground himself—to convince himself that this was real—when his thumb came into contact with an object concealed within the coverage. Seeking it out, the turian retrieved it and swiped the excess dirt from its once-metallic surface… And the bullet hole peeling strips of metal away to reveal the hollow inside.

Bittersweet memories came flooding into his mind from a time long since lived… Ecstatic grins, witty remarks, confessions, smooches… That all-too familiar silken raven hair cropped into a styled bob.  
Tears that yearned to surface were wrestled down into the deepest pit of his existence as he stood and gazed ahead to a fallen building that was no longer recognizable after its collapse. He loosed a breath.  
Eyes that refused to believe gulped down the sight if the dilapidated Presidium.

Desire and desperation sent the broken man scaling up the side of it, it proving to be a possibility due to its mostly crumbled walls, until his feet planted unsurely to the sturdiest slab visible. Nostrils thinned as he inhaled, secretly hoping to catch a slight string of her predominantly eradicated scent, when all he got was the smell of destruction and defeat.  
Years of training tried to battle with the emotions that attempted to clog his throat and nestle in his chest as he slumped to the slab and dangled his feet into the crack separating the roof of the Presidium.  
Fingers inspected the cavity positioned in the middle of the object in his palm. How did things go so horribly wrong?  
Garrus stared out into the distance and dissociated.

“What's the matter, Garrus?” A lively Shepard taunted, propping the sniper up onto her right shoulder, a grin lifting one corner of her mouth. “Scared?”  
Garrus chuckled as he rummaged through the provided crate. “The only thing I have to be scared of when it involves you, Shepard, is your horrific dancing.”  
Shepard frowned when he returned to her side and warmed up his dominant arm. “Aw, come on. I hear it enough from Kaidan and the crewmen below deck, and now I have to hear it from you, too?”  
A warm chuckle seeped through his splayed mandibles.  
Gabrielle refocused her attention and took aim.  
Garrus hurled the empty thermal clip into the air in front.  
Shepard shot. And missed.  
“I’m Garrus Vakarian and this is now my favourite spot on the Citadel!” Garrus announced, head held high with pride.  
“The wind must have caught my bullet and threw it off-course!”  
Garrus' mandibles flared with delight as he took her by the hip and pulled her closer. “There, there… you’re an adult; you can handle an understandable loss every once in a while.”  
Shepard exhaled roughly through her freckled nose, but didn’t pass on the opportunity to lean into the welcomed touch and nestle her head underneath his chin.

The warmth supplied by those fond memories instantaneously subsided once the remembrance ended, and an unwanted weight settled on his heart. Garrus knew she had done that on purpose. Her stance, her experience her concentration all pointed toward a guaranteed hit. Combine that with the smirk that claimed her mouth in response to his reaction… He just knew it was an intentional miss.  
Garrus angled his armoured index and started scratching at the whole end of the clip.

Gunfire exploded from all directions to push back the reaper forces. Mako's flipped, rendering them useless, as his back slammed into the only form of cover closest to them.  
Kaidan dropped to his knees to assist with stabilizing Garrus while Shepard radioed in to the Normandy.  
“Joker, if you can hear me—I need a fucking evac right now, young man!!” Shepard yelled, eyes that donned desperation burning into him.  
Within a matter of seconds, as if the ship was on standby for this exact reason, the Normandy descended, the time on their open window ticking loudly in his ear.  
Before he could think, Shepard and Kaidan were escorting him to the awaiting ship, to the promised sanctuary within… Until Gabrielle slipped out from beneath his arm and retreated a few paces.  
“You’ve gotta get out of here,” She said.  
Garrus used what was left of his strength to pivot both him and Kaidan to look at Shepard in disbelief. “And you’ve gotta be kidding!”  
“Don’t argue with me, Garrus.” Her tone and expression sharpened.  
Garrus swallowed. “We're in this ‘til the end!”  
Shepard didn’t even flinch when a Mako collided with another and erupted into flames behind her. “No matter what happens here,” she started, closing the gap between them to cup his scarred mandible, “you know I love you… I always will.”  
“Shepard, I…” She stepped away, leaving him reaching out to the void. “Love you, too.”  
The reaper defending the beacon seemed to inch closer, which had Shepard desperately yelling at them to leave.

He never knew that would be the very last time he would see her again. He continuously held onto the hope that she’d return, just like the time she was spaced, but she didn’t.  
Garrus' mandibles flared in anger as tears cascaded down his cheeks, seeping into every crack and crevice between the plates that made up his face. He had finished his etching and placed the clip down next to his thigh.  
With one last glance to engrave the sight into his mind, Garrus hopped off the Presidium roof and started making his way toward where the Normandy was stationed.

‘I always knew you were the better shot.’


End file.
